For Autumn/Winter debuts, Fashion Week's Ready-To-Wear collections kick-off in New York just as the month of February settles in and from there it immediately moves to London, followed by Milan, and ends with a bang in Paris one month later. It's nonstop action for top editors, tastemakers, buyers, designers, photographers, stylists and basically anyone A-D list that's worthy of an invite. Esteemed well-known brands come together with the newer, stranger little guys in the hopes of amassing as much praise and press necessary to land on the hottest bodies and in the very best stores. For anyone that follows the industry, social and news feeds are laden with beautiful, weird, controversial, or silly runway styles put forth by one designer after another endlessly, until it's all over. Much like a shorter, better dressed version of the Presidential Campaign Trail. Now that the glitter has settled on the runways in Paris and A/W Fashion Week 2016 has come to a close, I thought I'd have some much needed fun with our current Presidential Candidates and pair them with the latest collections based on their similarities.
This is all hypothetical of course, so please try not to get your knickers in a twist over the fact that these are primarily women's collections in a male dominated platform. This is all purely in good fun. Ladies and gentlemen take your seats, you're all invited to the front row. No extreme biases here. I give you the Presidential Fashion Week 2016:
Secretary Hillary Rodham Clinton: Kate Spade (NYC) ~ Because the female frontrunner loves herself a good ole cushy corporation and a big brand name from which she shares a platform with her equally successful husband, Jack Spade. Like the brand, The Secretary has remade herself countless times to appease the status quo and the latest trends. She's not super exciting, but has maintained a steady following and solid demand for her strong ladylike aesthetic and classic lines. Lots of pink, plenty of red, and bits of plaid tweed this season perfect for busting balls in the boardroom to schmoozing with billionaires and hosting Junior League brunches.
Senator Bernie Sanders: The Elder Statesman (NYC) ~ Despite the name, this more elusive brand evokes a youthful style built around old world methods. TES is all about quality over quantity; producing a smaller collection made from hand-spun pashmina, knits and pure cotton. For the guy or gal that lives off the land but enjoys a little folk, some old rock n' roll, and even a dash of punk. At first glance the line appears a little messy, a little disheveled, and quite certainly a bit hippie, but try them on and they're surprisingly comfortable. Although you're still not convinced the style is for you, or if you could even pull it off. However, you're supremely impressed with the designer's abilities to create super affordable pieces out of luxe goods while his competition boasts heftier price tags.
Senator Marco Rubio: Iceberg (Milan) ~ Because the Senator is not convinced it's America's problem the icecaps are dramatically melting. But also for the younger brand's energetic and playful approach to "get me noticed" styles copied from more experienced design houses that precede him. Iceberg repeats a lot of the same prints throughout the collection, reminiscent of youthful Tetris blocks fighting for space. It's approachable yet not fully relatable. Like, fur pants might seem like a good idea but you'll probably immediately regret wearing them. Perhaps the brand just needs to age a bit more.
Senator Ted Cruz: Dolce & Gabbana (Milan) ~ Much like designers Stefano and Domenico's latest collection inspired by Disney Princesses, the Senator claims his wife, Heidi, and their two daughters, inspire him daily and are his own "real life princesses". But also because Cruz is highly opinionated with very old school ideals that regularly tend to cause modern day controversy, much like the high priced designers'. From the "Slave Sandal" to tax evasion and denouncing same sex parenting despite their own homosexuality, Dolce & Gabbana finds it difficult to stay out of hot water. However, these guys haven't lost any popularity despite the occasional ickiness endured, and are still in pretty high demand.
Retired Neurosurgeon Ben Carson: Carven (Paris) ~ Because the guy enjoys carving things and was pretty successful (or not?) in doing it. Carson has since suspended his campaign but he earned a space here. Carven put out a trippy, oftentimes odd collection built around sci-fi, adventure, and "good girls", if that makes any sense at all. Then again we're talking politics and fashion, so forget about sensibility for a minute. While some pieces were stranger than others, overall it was a rather quiet and subdued debut with more than one ensemble appropriate for Sunday worship.
Governor John Kasich: Les Copains (Milan) ~ Because despite his shortcomings he's seemingly more calm; the "friendlier" guy in the GOP group that mostly stays away from endless attacks. Also, Les Copains is primarily a knitwear collection; loads of sweaters, turtlenecks and outerwear perfect for the chilly Ohio air. Only catch is I'm not 100% convinced the Governor would approve of the underlying progressive sexiness to a multitude of otherwise feminine frocks.
Businessman Donald Trump: Yeezy (NYC) ~ Because it's the perfect storm of overinflated egos, self-obsession and self-promotion. For those of you unaware, Yeezy is Kanye West's attempt at fashion. Need I say more? Absolutely. This collection is more about the artist's affection for baggy hoodies and designing "clothes" for himself and his equally infamous wife than for actual consumers, which are beneath him. West won't stop "creating" until the world deems him the "GREATEST ARTIST THAT EVER LIVED"; a lot like the businessman's entire campaign. Regardless of the [offensive] designer "rags" being sold for thousands of dollars; people can't get enough. Makes zero sense at all. But don't tell them that, or you're likely to be subjected to an ongoing Twitter rant.
Ah, fashion. It's so political.